je taime

"love is just a four letter word" she said "and like most four letter words it's:

"foul"

They're everywhere. The cynical, damaged girls – hurt too many times by careless lovers and foolish judgements. Played with, toyed with, neglected and thrown away. Shame on silly boys then, we should say. Well we could, but let's not give them any more power than they've already taken from us.

Here's the real truth about love. It's not easy. It's not perfect and it's never going to be convenient. That's half its charm. And yes, it makes you vulnerable and yes it means you might get hurt and yes it means you'll have to work harder at it than you've ever done at anything in your life. You want easy – go to a drive through. You're guaranteed a pretty tasteless meal every time.

But now – love. The kind that gets you out of bed sick and exhausted, the kind that makes you be more of a human being than you thought possible, the kind that changes you in a decidely unromantic fashion – that is something we should sink our teeth into.

I've not been afraid of love since 1999. A special man changed all my pre-conceptions of this particular artform. In fact, I've only just realised that, this week. His love for me, gave me back my faith in so many ways. If that sounds cliche you should try it out for size. I've been paying it forward ever since.

It hasn't always worked, It often doesn't but I've found the more I do it, the richer I become inside – even when it's not reciprocated. Especially then.

I don't always write posts like this. Less and less these days, really. I don't feel the need to espouse wisdom on these matters, anymore. People learn things when they're ready, not because you are. But this was a good place to remember that I'm a girl who'll never give up on love. And that is wonderful.